skipper12383's site



A police officer pulls over a speeding car. The officer       says,’ I
clocked you at 80 miles per hour, sir.’

The driver says, ‘Gee, officer, I had it on cruise control at 60;
perhaps your       radar gun needs calibrating. ‘

Not looking up from her knitting the wife says:       ‘Now don’t be
silly, dear       — you know that this car doesn’t have       cruise

As the officer writes out the ticket, the driver       looks over at
his wife and growls,
‘Can’t you please keep your mouth shut for once       !! ?’

The wife smiles demurely and says,       ‘Well dear       you should be
thankful your radar detector went off when it did or your       speed
would have been higher.’

As the officer makes out the       second       ticket for the
illegal radar detector unit, the man glowers at his wife and says
through clenched teeth,
‘Woman, can’t you keep your mouth shut?’

The officer frowns and says, ‘And I notice that you’re not wearing your
seat belt,       sir.
That’s an automatic $75 fine.’

The driver says, ‘Yeah, well, you see, officer, I had it on, but I took
it off       when you pulled me over so that I could get my license out
of my back       pocket.’

The wife says, ‘Now, dear,       you know very well that you didn’t
have your seat belt on. You never wear       your seat belt when you’re

And as the police officer is writing out the       third       ticket,
the driver turns to his wife and       barks, ‘WILL YOU PLEASE SHUT

The officer looks over at the woman and asks,       ‘Does your husband
always talk to you this way,       Ma’am?’

(I love this part)

‘Only when he’s been drinking       !!!

3 responses

  1. jennyozzy

    thats really funny lol have a great week xxjen

    April 12, 2011 at 5:10 PM

  2. Seth@ChaosHQ's

    “…wife from hell..” —> my EX!!!

    April 10, 2011 at 11:40 AM

  3. Seth@ChaosHQ's

    Bwahahahaha! Who needs enemies when you have a wife! Honesty is always the best policy. *Seth coughs*

    March 29, 2011 at 11:46 AM

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